My lady friends and I are AMAZED at the acceptance and following these posts are having…Thank you dear reader, we don’t know you but we are grateful for giving us a few minutes of your day to listen to our stories…the stories of regular women just like all of us, that, as we all do, have something to say!!
Let’s continue with Laura, (if you haven’t, please check out the complete series(click here)…and the first part of my chat with Laura (click here))
So sweetheart, we haven’t come all this way on our own…who has given you the best advice? QUIEN TE HA DADO LOS MEJORES CONSEJOS?
LAURA: The best advice has come from my mom…her words: solidarity/ loyalty…your education is your best and only inheritance…you’ll always regret more what you didn’t do than what you did…do what makes you happy: travel, eat,sleep, love, cry, dance, read; do it as much as you can and as often as possible…take care of your feet- those are the only ones you’ll ever have and they’ll carry you throughout your life…serving, sharing and teaching it doesn’t take anything away, on the contrary it enriches you…live life, it goes by the same if you do as if you don’t…
ME: these are all quotable! and true, and practical…it’s amazing how your mom, a beautiful, intelligent woman as well! impacted and foresaw every aspect of your life, from your heart, soul, mind to your physical self…and she is living proof af the veracity of these teachings…can I be like her when I grow up?!
OK, dearest, now you, what has been the best advice you’ve given…the apple never falls too far from the tree…EL/LOS MEJOR(ES CONSEJO(S) QUE HAS DADO?
LAURA: It’s OK, you’re OK, this too shall pass…Your stomach never lies…Smile and go forth…Every accion or lack of has a reward or a consequence: you always have a choice
ME: You know, these are words that even we have to constantly repeat to ourselves, specially remind us that WE ALWAYS HAVE A CHOICE.
And on that topic, and by now I can imagine your answer to the next question..but you do it best…when did you first realize you were your own boss? that only you were responsible for yourself and your acts? CUANDO TE DISTE CUENTA DE QUE TU ERAS TU PROPIO JEFE Y QUE SÓLO TU ERAS RESPOSABLE DE TI Y DE TUS ACTOS?
LAURA: It was a process I went through but I think it all started when I realized I wasn’t in love with my ex-husband anymore, nor was I angry at him. It was a kind of ending to my grieving period over the hopes and dreams you had and becoming aware that, if you take up the challenge, you can now be the director of the next chapters in your life. In a way I realized that neither life nor anyone owed me anything, almost everything depends on me and my attitude.
You see, it wasn’t an exact moment, it was more of an evolution, an awakening, an awareness that took place bit by bit…although, I do know the exact moment when it all started.
It was February 2005, I was turning 33 and had been divorced now for 3 years but was still my ex-husband’s ‘girlfriend’. He had taken me to Las Vegas (his favorite place) as a birthday present. Eventhough a part of me was having a good time- ignoring my better judgement-, my body started screaming at me things I did not want to hear. Half the time there I spent with a terrible migraine accompanied by an immense and intense pain on half of my face (it was the TRIGEMINAL NERVE, from below my eye all the way to my ear and jawbone). But as tha strong woman I am I put up with it to avoid making anyone feel uncomfortable. The evening when we got back home I felt so bad that the next morning I looked up a neurologist and , without my complete eyesight (no one could take me), drove to the hospital and went directly to the emergency room.
That day the doctor told me several things, that in retrospect were key in my life.
He asked if I was depressed…I answered a categorical NO, I don’t get depressed! But at that same moment I could hold no longer hold back the tears. Some way the conversation took us to my recent trip with my ex-husband, to which he asked if I planned to get back together with him, and I answered YES…which was followed by him saying SAME HELL, SAME DEVIL…finally after many head exams he diagnosed me with MIGRAINE and TRIGEMINAL NEURALGIA, and added that this was a condition only elderly people suffer. A medical mystery and one of the most painful known to man. He prescribed a medication for epilepsy which made me feel ‘drugged’ all the time.
During that time my mom gave me a book by Louis L. Hay titled You Can Heal Your Life which I think is what detonated my change in perspective: I decided I wasn’t going to depend on medicines and I realized that no one was going to come and save me. That only I was responsible for my decisions and even for having let others decide for me. That’s when I started being my own boss!
ME: I am suddenly feeling like such a wimp, jajajaaa…sweetheart I laugh and make light of it now because you are here, thankfully you are well and this is all a memory from the past, one from which you grew…
No wonder I’m still the most immature almost-40 year old I know…I’m not whining, jejejeee..I’ll get there when I get there
WOW, people… are you speechless like I am?
If this has hit a nerve (hopefully not the TRIGEMINAL, yikes!) please leave a comment, Laura, Cristy (my sister-friend) and I will be happy to reply…
as you should sweetie!! algún cumpleanos lo celebraremos todas juntas..será algo especial…the 40th kind of creeped up on us (the climb uphill has kept us pretty busy- let’s enjoy the view) and we didn’t plan ahead…but there’s plenty more and it’s up to us to make it unforgettable…have a safe trip, take lots of pics..send them all!! I’ll call you tomorrow to wish you a fab NYC bday AGAIN!! love you sister!!
I am inspired and in awe of my friend Laura, a WOMAN in every sense of the word. Thank you Lau for your wise words. And thank you sisterfriend Ale for posting this and all the wisdom that is generating from it. Who knew we had so much to say? Also, thank you for the birthday shout out, yes indeed, tomorrow I am 40 years old and intend to celebrate it to the fullest… Besos y abrazos.